Monday, November 12, 2012

Top Five Lines I Say to Men…….


….To get them to leave me alone. I know what your saying. “Isn’t she single? Why would she intentionally try to make men run?” 

As some of us already know, some men can’t handle rejection. On several occasions I have declined an offer with a smile and a kind no thank you only to be cursed out and told I thought I was to good. Sooooo, I decided  to take a different approach. Sometimes I just want to chop it up with my girls and not be bothered by Jeromey Rome. No offense.

1. I just got out of a relationship. This is the main one I use. My thought process is that no one wants to be the rebound guy or deal with someone who is still getting over the ex. This works about 40% of the time. Hey, gotta roll those dice anyway,right? Right!

2. This one is more of look instead of words. I look at guy and blink without smiling while answering his questions with one to three words. Example: “So, I’ve never seen you here before. Is this your first time here?” Me: “No (blink about 5 times).”  This works most of the time.

3. Jesus has my heart. I only pull the Jesus card when the “I just got out of a relationship” card doesn’t work. Please don’t judge me (in my Chris Brown voice). Sometimes you got to pull out the big guns. This works most of the time. Every now and then you’ll get a joker that says Jesus told him that you were his wife. Yes, this has happened to me.

4. I’m celibate. I know what your saying. “Why would you tell someone that when you first meet them?” Simple, because it works 100% of the time! I use this when one, two, and three fail me. I’m just waiting on the day when someone says ME TOO. I don’t know how I would react.

5. My ex is crazy and I think I seen him posted up in the corner . Yes, I will say this. I’ve rarely had to use this but sometimes one through four just don’t cut it. Some people can’t take no for an answer. Believe me, I’ve thought about  saying I was pregnant. I don’t think I could say that with a straight face.

Ladies, have you ever had to use one of these lines? Do you have a certain one you use to get men to give you fifty feet? Fellas,has anyone used any of these lines on you? Please share in the comment section. Also, don't forget to subscribe!

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  1. Good lines. I can hear you saying #3 in your Southern Belle accent. I actually chuckled thinking of you saying it.

    1. LOL! No southern bell accent here. I say it dry and stern so they know I mean business.

  2. I love number two! I have so seen you do this look and it cracks me up! I think I would hate to be the guy on the receiving end of that look!

    1. Thanks for stopping by! Sometimes I give that look and not even realize I'm doing it....