1:not married 2: unaccompanied by others 3a: consisting of having only one part, feature, or portion.

And that my friends, is Webster's definition of single.1  Yes its true that I’m not married. “Having only one part, feature, or portion.” That's the part that gets me. I've always had the idea that I had to be whole. Truth be told, I still believe that. Another truth be told, sometimes I don't feel so whole. But that's another post for another day...

Thank goodness for Urban Dictionary!
1. When you are currently not in a relationship with a significant other…

That's more like it. To be fair, I’m sure Webster was referring to a thing as well as a person. The problem is, some of us single women over 30, me included, refer to ourselves the same way Webster has described us. Having only one part, feature, or portion. Often times we think of ourselves as not being whole without someone. I've felt this way many times.  I really need to change my mindset if I’m going to be content with being single. I have to decide what I want. Do I want to be an Urban Dictionary single or do I want to be a Webster's single? 

I think the first step to recovery is admitting I have an issue. Hello. My name is Jessica and I’m a Webster's dictionary single.

What type of  “single” are you? Are you striving to move past that definition or are you happy just where you are? Feel free to discuss!

Blogging While Single and Over 30 was created for women AND men who are much more than single. We will discuss relationships, hair, cooking, kids, politics and much more. If you have any questions or ideas for post, feel free to send me an email at bloggingwhilesingle@gmail.com. Be blessed!


  1. My name is Cherie Ward. I am 40 years old and an Urban Dictionary Single! Guess what? I am single by choice. I have turned down 2 marriage proposals, ended some relationships, have chosen to turn down some guys who were interested and fell for a few guys that were just not into me. Nevertheless, I am sooo grateful for my Urban Dictionary single experience. Looking back my heart was in the right place, BUT I was not prepared emotionally and mentally for the task of being someone's WIFE! God has placed me in a season of learning, growing, and waiting before He trusts me with the AWESOME man of God that He has prepared for me! Truthfully, "Currently not in a relationship with a significant other…" is okay with me!

    1. WOW! Thanks for your feed back Cherie. That's a great and positive place to be in. We're in the same season for a reason. Be blessed and continue to inspire!

  2. Hmm by definition I am an Urban Dictionary single and it’s okay that I am. I tell all of my married friends I am happy I did not get married earlier in life. The truth is I would probably be divorced and it would have been because of my way or the highway tendencies. In addition, I had this idea that submission meant I would have to lose all of who I am just to secure a husband and for me that is a complete turn off. Not sure if the media or simply the marriages I saw lead me to believe these things. Now I can say that for the first time in my life I read the word more on my own to gain a deeper understanding of key biblical principles of marriages and relationships. Would I be the perfect wife probably not? However, I do understand more about unconditional love and exhibiting the fruits of the spirit daily. Also, trying to hold on to guys that weren't in to me has also taught me a lot. If he says you are the not the one its okay because to the right man you will be that one when he was searching for a ten(Shoutout to Lecrae's song Special). Until the right man finds me I will be happy single but open to marriage but focusing on becoming a more godlier woman daily.

  3. I think alot of us had the wrong idea about submission. I hate to say it, but in the black community we don't see much of it.